No Direction

Hello all,
Guess it’s a long long time since i posted. Although there have been moments when I hovered over the new post button, contemplating and then finally deciding against it. Right now, this is an impulsive decision and I’m in fact thinking as I write.

Way too many things have happened between my last post and this one. Literally.

To start with, I went home after a year. My parents live in the other side of the earth where it’s not time to go to sleep yet. The journey was long both ways and gave me plenty of time to introspect. I have changed over last year. Yet again. It’s as if every summer I go off like a clockwork wondering what my choices would be at the moment. I’m still largely indecisive. On one side I have the academic/professional career pertaining to the major I’m pursuing, and on other side there still is Music. Something that I’ve always loved. How much? I do not know. It’s still a question I find difficult to answer. One year since the dilemma, I’ve continued to be reluctant to proceed either way, inching in each direction one step at a time.

My scores have improved by a good extent. Another year into college has taught me how to get by things and survive in a bad bad world. A year into my college Tech Fest’s organizing team has taught me how to manage people, how to work professionally, not bringing personal judgements and opinions into picture, looking at the larger goal and putting the team first.

Summer was a different experience altogether. Visiting another country was interesting. There were things that I liked about the place, things I didn’t. By nature, I did resort to comparison trying to find the cause for various things. And having not visited as a tourist, I could get a glimpse into the everyday life of an average person in that land, which I don’t think everyone gets.

There were a lot of things that transpired there, although there might be a couple of things I would like to highlight. More so because they are the ones most memorable, close to my heart and two things that I had written down in my ‘To Do in Life’ list.

Radiohead Concert at Camden, NJ



I’m sure all of you know how much a crazy Radiohead fan I am. In fact it has become a way of identifying me at college. I take pride in it 😛
Ever since Radiohead had announced their King of Limbs tour dates, I had been on the lookout for some place close to home where they’d play. I finally found one, and with great difficulty, managed to get the tickets for the front section(after the pit.)
I can’t really express in words how it was to see my favourite band play my favourite songs, less than fifty meters from where I stood. I’m not quite sure if it was the spectacular music, or the lighting, or the weed smoke wafting in the air, but the whole concert is still a haze. The few videos that I took are the sole concrete memories of the concert. Otherwise, it’s mostly the emotion and the adrenal rush that I tend to recall when I think about the concert. I think everyone is entitled to that ephoric sensation at least once in life. I’m certain it’s beyond any form of vice to get high over music.

Telecaster.



After a long hunt through a number of shops, I finally bought an original Mexican Fender Telecaster in Philadelphia. It is a used guitar, but sounds just fine. Almost every part of it functioning perfectly. It’s another big step in life for me, to own a guitar that’s technically a kin of that of my God.
I subsequently bought a Roland Cube15XL amp with basic clean and distortion channels.
I haven’t much to say about this, except that it’s big for me, which I’ve said already. I’m trying to become a better guitarist, a better musician maybe. Although I’m not sure if that’s not I want to be the most.

It’s third year at college, and yet another batch of juniors have arrived. I suddenly feel grown up now. I think it’s time for me to assume responsibility of things, and accept being eligible for judgement by people. I still have a lot of choices to make in life, a lot of big decisions, a lot of people to consult, seek guidance and get inspired by. A lot to learn.

Until I blog again,
Sumanth

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